ODIN SPHERE: Frigging Wizards

I love this game, but there is one enemy that just makes me completely lose patience. This is the wizard. These little jerks are raised in a dingy city known at Titania, where I have spent some of the most frustrating moments of the entire game. Part of this is due to the fact that wizardly biology allows for a single wizard mother to whelp a litter of between eight and twelve of the beard-stroking abominations in a single breeding.

The other is their annoying propensity to teleport away the very second you hit them. Of course only the 'pointy hat' breed of wizard will perform this particular injustice upon you, the weaker (and far less numerous) 'hoodie' breed of wizard will just stand there and take their beatings like normal enemies, bless their little hearts.

Now all of this is really not even the issue, because this part of the wizard experience is totally manageable, cute even. It is when you add their varied and totally cheap attacks into the mix that you begin to understand true evil. Both species of odinius wizaratus have the following player-enraging powers;

1. throwing fireballs (natch)
2. summoning little eyeball familiars (not too annoying here)
3. creating whirling swords that shoot out at you in various mesmerizing patterns and do serious damage (not my favorite)
4. summoning ice spirts (this one we don't need)
5. summoning fire spirits (also wik)
6. summoning incorporeal as in untouchable yet still quite damaging spirit beasties from the netherworld (WTF?)
7. damaging+poisoning you from half a level away (We need more wizard regulation in America!)
8. AND turning you into a frigging frog.

As you can see any extended battle with two or more of these wretches quickly leads to ten or so other flying beasties chasing you down as you try to dodge whirling swords and fireballs while poisoned. THEN when you finally get to them and they TELEPORT away! What gives? Why do these game developers hate us so? Is it karma? Is there a god?

You might want to wait to ask yourself the last question because these terrible, hateful robe wearing demons can also be bosses. No no, not mid-bosses, the real deal. There are three wizards in the main story; Urzur, Skuldi, and Beldor and they all suck ass. Why sugar coat it? All three need to be fought at different times, though it seems only once each. Beldor appears as the handler of a dragon named Belial at a few times at the start of the game. Of course you don't fight Beldor at that point because anyone confronted with his cheap ass bull so early on would probably quit the game.

I don't want people to get the wrong idea, these little fucks can be beaten. I've done it a bunch of times already. You just need to strike their whirling swords back at them, which stuns them momentarily and keeps them from teleporting away. The problem becomes doing this twenty times against the wizard bosses while fighting all their pets. I am currently stuck on the Beldor boss battle where you have to fight the wizard and the dragon at the same time. This is probably the hardest boss battle in the game, in my defense. All I have to say is... this charade ends tonight, Beldor.